Fight It!

Kesabaran dalam ketaatan. 

Susahnyaaa...kan?

Tapi sebab tu jugaklah banyak kali Allah sebut dalam Qur'an yang orang sabar akan dapat ganjaran syurga. 

Dan tadi, dalam usrah baru tadabbur balik surah Ad-Dhuha. 

Rasa macam U_U Allah tengah pujuk balik diri ni. 

Y'know, there are times when we're left in despair and falls into depression. 

Ye, orang yang join usrah pun mengalami depression kay..I used to think it wasn't that possible. Ya know, since we're all been talking bout God and all. 

But bam, one day it happened to you it just rendered you speechless. Kau rasa macam kau dah tak berdaya nak buat apa. Kau rasa macam struggle sangat nak terus buat baik setiap saat TT___TT

Depression aside, surah Dhuha ni kalau tadabbur waktu tengah down, memang sangat boleh fefeeling habis. Dan sangat boleh membuatkan kita rasa sebak, terharu, meleleh air mata dan seterusnya. 

Sebabnya kalau kita go through surah ni, daripada asbabun nuzul (sebab2 penurunan) sampailah ke tafsir setiap ayat, kita dapat merasa macamana keadaan Rasulullah saw pada waktu tu~! The emptiness he felt and how much He's in need of Allah's comforting words. 

Seriyesly speaking, it takes real and raw strength to deal with yourself when you're feeling like super down. Y'know, that feeling of unworthiness and being an utmost failure which sometimes leaves you wondering if you want to end your life like this. Nauzubillah...

I think I slightly understand people who had it rough, who somehow fell into deep sh*t situation they don't even know where to turn to. 

First thing I'd say, get a grip on yourself and don't forget to find God everyday. Remember God, do your own things out of Love to Him, don't stop seek Him for all you care. 

Make yourself busy with rememberance of God, make those self-inflicted negative comments to stop! Stop saying to yourself that you're ugly, not making any contribution, stupid or anything of the likes. 

Love yourself, love yourself, love yourself as you are one of the precious gems that God has created on this Earth. 

Try reaching to others, even if its that one person you've always been contacting. He/she would've love to help. Even if sometimes there's doubt that he/she'll understand you, just try. Cuz for all you know, you are actually in need of comfort from others. 

You can make winds of change, if you make effort for it. Just don't dwell on the depression puddle or hole any longer. 

You'll win the fight inshaAllah :) :)

#personal